Compassion Cracks
M Alan Roberts

The world is on fire. And are you laughing?

Buddha

A beautiful day today was; warm, breezy and bright. I delighted in taking my best friend; and stinky, furry Son, Buckethead, the Pitt-Lab, on an Ohio creek-walk. He digs that immensely.

In the midst of my much-enjoyed springtime tranquility, I powerlessly daydreamt of cracking a corrupted cop's neck, once again. This idea seems to occur more and more in the past few years. Snap, Crackle and Pop! I guess that's my mind's natural response to having to witness the beatings and other brutalities unleashed onto my planetary brothers and sisters via these squads of malicious goons. Honestly, it could have been a bent politician and not a crooked cop; I can't differentiate any longer. I call them all “copiticians.” You see, the world has me pissed off, almost to the point of not being able to function some days. I feel an imagined scowl on my face, even as I physically offer a grin, a full, broad Buddhist's smile for those whom I pass by.

I make it a point to be the one who draws your eye to me on a sidewalk. I smile and give a friendly nod, or a quiet “Hello.” Most times, the receiver just walks on by, inattentive to my small act of kindness. It's as if they're too beat down by life to care about common courtesies any longer. They're more like, “Screw it. I don't have to return your smile. As long as I do what I am told by my government and pay my taxes, I don't even have to be kind.”

I think that's bs

I believe that love and compassion are all that this world has in terms of sustainable hope for a kinder future. I listen to and, actually, contemplate, a read recording of the Buddha's Dhammapada daily, several times. I leave it play on a YouTube loop while I sleep, barely audible, subliminal mental programming for my ever-wanting dome. I believe in the wisdom of the words there. They comfort me, and they seem to be the only thing left that can comfort me, besides Buckethead, nature, weed, booze and music. I do my very best to have faith in karma, even though I rarely seem to witness its fruition.

I wait. I watch. I work. I practice and I always seem to fail.

Every damn day I fail again to be more loving toward the world in general.

My failure stems from the fact that I can no longer see any valid meaning in what others envelope themselves in. They relish bribable and arrogant sports figures that wouldn't pee to extinguish their flesh bound flames. They follow, like suckling puppies, the grossly proud Hollywood stars, as those same “role models” bask in the roots of their own vile whoredom. Then those innocent, ignorant societal slaves, most disgustingly of all perhaps, glamorize heinous politicians that are currently plotting to exterminate the masses, enthralled servants included. Oh, what ignorance I see!

Is it only me?

To me, if you dedicate your life, working consistently to pay for that big house, I see only foolishness there. If you live to serve your “beloved” wife and maybe some oh-so-innocent children, then I find that disgusting, almost to the point of involuntary regurgitation. The question is why.

If you dedicate your life to easing the suffering of others, like a good person providing for his family, it is supposed to be a blessing to you. It is supposed to increase your karmic value, so that you can experience some serious bliss. That’s a huge supposedly.

Yet, in my life, I haven't even witnessed enough karmic justice to justify any faith at all. It all seems so damn void. Empty. Coincidentally, emptiness is one of the integral concepts associated with Buddhism. I meditate on emptiness daily and it is lonely.

I like an occasional well-performed movie, but I do not watch television. I don't even own one anymore. I already know what there is to see on it: only unenlightened societal distraction; leaving the masses more confused, less ambitious and ever depressed in essence.

It makes me wretch to experience the daily news, how mainstream governmental controllers dictate the “truths” we hear. It makes me nearly scream aloud to witness how many common folk, blindly, fearfully, balllessly, follow their “leaders'” self-serving commands. Like cowardly beggars, my fellow Americans fall impotently into their sheepish places; serving their government even as they are marked for sure, impoverished, sickly deaths.

Do you not understand that world governments, most of them anyway, are under control, too? Can you not have the courage to face your fears and admit that you are next in line for killing? Now, most probably, you won't be vigorously flame thrown to death like the innocent children and adults at Waco, Texas. No, it’s more likely your elimination will be slow, via nano-technologies introduced into your body through any one or more of the many available channels of induction.

Truth is, it doesn't matter if I am wrong or right. It is happening anyway, and everyone, except apparently you, if you disagree, knows it. There is an international strategy to eliminate billions of people. This is not my opinion; it is a concrete example of directly applied mathematics. It is a fact that you must embrace. You see, the world is heavily overpopulated; and growing, growing. This produces a complex situation for my meditation capacity.

The Buddha asserted that all beingness is meaningful, and equally worthy of life's resources. It's extreme, but unlike the Buddha, your government must look at you, and everyone else, based on their individual, quantifiable likelihoods to generate production of one type or another. In essence, show that you are at least temporarily valuable or prepare to line up for killing. This is the American, Zimbabwean and even the Mexican way. Produce and be more and more taxed or get the hell off this planet. Die!

I’m going back my own selfish world. I want to love all people equally; to show unlimited compassion for them. However, it does somewhat sicken me to see certain “types” of people, sucking up on the limited resources. Still, as ill as it makes me feel personally, governments do not and will not ever have even the limited amount of compassion that I do. They can't afford to. There are too many people and some of them really do not seem to give anything back to society. Rapists, murderers, thieves, pedophiles, corrupt politicians and, yes, vitiated cops. Do we need these jobs? Should we reserve available resources for those that are worth?

Yeah, I know. Who can judge the worth of another? Not me, that’s for sure.

I wouldn't really want the weight of that job, anyway. Remember that governments are actively making those choices all the time. Who produces? Who sponges? Who lives and who dies? They have and are continually developing new ways to rid of us.

Would it be so difficult for them to add selective nano-agents into the salt, milk or water supply? Don't forget about chemical trails, pesticides, herbicides, GMOs, vaccinations and the mainstream food supply. It goes on and on; if it comes right down to it, you will get Wacoized if they deem you a large enough threat to their master strategy of domination and population reduction.

This springtime Ohio evening is as beautiful as this morning was. I think back to cruising in the creek with Buckethead, this afternoon; I feel serene. I feel easy and want to love everyone. Then, from the recesses of my tormented mind: that twisted copitician, again.