Watching Time
Jennifer Flaten

I am slightly obsessed with knowing what time it is, to that end, I have a clock in every room and I wear a watch night and day. Not the same watch, of course, different watches. That’s right; I have a watch that I specifically wear at night.

I have a watch that I specifically wear at night.

I might have refrained from telling you that lest you think I am a tad eccentric, but let’s face it you already think I am on the far side of eccentric.

Now that we’ve established my eccentricity, I can tell you why I wear a watch at night. Sadly, the reason isn’t crazy or, at least, it doesn‘t seem crazy to me, but am I really the best judge?

I wear a watch simply because I need to it to tell the time, even in the middle of the night. I am a light sleeper. When the cat sneezing wakes me up I want to know the time. 

I don’t know about you but I feel a certain smugness when I wake up at 2 am and realize I can, in fact, go back to sleep. I am less cheerful when I wake up and realize the alarm is going to ring any second.

Sure most people use an alarm clock for that, but since I can’t see worth a damn without my glasses, the only way that would work for me is if the numerals were ten feet tall.

I did see a clock that projected the time onto the ceiling in enormous font, but thought might keep me awake at night. The night watch has a nice mellow blue light that only illuminates when you push the button.

My night watch has an alarm.

In addition to telling time, the watch has an alarm. Yes, I have heard of alarm clocks. Let me explain: an alarm clock strapped to my wrist was a necessity with newborn twins. 

During their babyhood, I had no idea where I would ultimately end up sleeping. I have a long list of places I did end up sleeping including, in the rocking chair in the living room, but sadly, I rarely slept in my bed.

I needed an alarm clock that came with me wherever I roamed in the course of the night.

Despite my kids no longer needing night feedings I still find myself strapping on my watch. During school days, it ensures I never sleep through the alarm, no matter how late I stayed up reading and during the summer it makes me pleased to know I can shut the alarm off and sleep for another hour.

My original night watch finally went to the great time keeping place in the sky. I didn’t want to retire it, but the strap broke.

Like any normal person I tried to find a replacement strap, yeah that is impossible. The kids running the watch kiosks in the mall couldn’t fathom replacing a band; why not just buy a brand new $100 watch.

Most people, today, check time on a phone.

The kids working the jewelry department in the big box store didn’t even know you could wear a watch on your wrist, they thought everyone used their phone to check the time.

Since the Holy Grail is easier to find than a replacement watchband I just gave up and bought a cheap digital watch. About a month after I bought it the band that holds the strap down broke. Now the strap flops around a pokes me in the middle of the night-craftsmanship gotta love it.

Meanwhile, I couldn’t bear to part with my old watch. It is slumbering in my drawer, every day it beeps at 7 am, sort of a fail-safe alarm.

During the day I try to class it up a little and switch from the rubberized digital watch to my animatronic watch, it has dancing frogs on the face.