11:05:06 am on
Monday 17 Jun 2024

Best Birthday
AJ Robinson

You ever have someone to buy some birthday gifts for, and you just can't think of what to get them? My wife can be like that. It' such a classic situation, one any husband can relate to. I ask her with sorts of birthday gifts to get her, and she says she'll love anything I get her. And then she hates whatever I get her!

Well, not this year, my friends. No, this time, I did my homework and drew up a list of potential birthday gifts. I guess me being an engineer contributes to that; I can be a little too organized in my planning. Anyway, once I had a decent list of birthday gifts to work with, I assigned them a point value. I know, too organized! What can I say?

What I did was consider when was the last time my wife had partaken of the activity related to the item. She hadn't done pottery in a long time, so the household kiln got knocked down a few notches. Painting was still fun for her, so the artist's easel was moved up a bit, and so on.

And then, a few days later, I saw something in the newspaper that just about leapt out and slapped me in the face. There was an ad for an upcoming Neil Diamond concert. Well, when it came to a list of perfect birthday gifts, two tickets to that concert belong right at the top. I could toss the list aside; I'd found just what I needed.

Now, the challenge was to get them without her knowing. Here again, my job as an engineer proved useful. As it happened, I needed to go the country administration building to drop off some plans the next day. It was perfect, the arena was right on the way. So, leaving the office, plans and paperwork in hand, I made my drop-off, and then stopped at the arena.

Once I had those tickets, I was on cloud nine. Yes, for once, I had the most perfect of birthday gifts. And, they were easy enough to smuggle into the house unseen. Her circular saw had been a real bear! Yes, I got my wife a circular saw one year as one of her birthday gifts. And no, I didn't have to sleep in the couch for doing it. My wife happens to love to do all kinds of arts and crafts. So, for her, tools are actually tops on her list of birthday gifts.

On her special day, I presented her with a card, and the tickets were hidden inside. Needless to say, they were just about the best present ever, as far as she was concerned. No offense, but he doesn't do much for me; I prefer Britney.

Just kidding!

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Combining the gimlet-eye of Philip Roth with the precisive mind of Lionel Trilling, AJ Robinson writes about what goes bump in the mind, of 21st century adults. Raised in Boston, with summers on Martha's Vineyard, AJ now lives in Florida. Working, again, as an engineeer, after years out of the field due to 2009 recession and slow recovery, Robinson finds time to write. His liberal, note the small "l," sensibilities often lead to bouts of righteous indignation, well focused and true. His teen vampire adventure novel, "Vampire Vendetta," will publish in 2020. Robinson continues to write books, screenplays and teleplays and keeps hoping for that big break.

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